Penguin remembers a simpler time, reading on a kindle by candle light.
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Looking in the mirror, Penguin sees a head covered in dandruff and thinks, “How can I have dandruff…I’m bald.”
Sitting in his bubble chair, searching for a job, Penguin thinks, “I must consider the impact a new job will have on my quality of life. When I love my job the days fly by. When the days fly by so does my life. I’ll be dead before I know it.” “To make life feel longer I should find a job I hate, where the hours feel like days.” “Existential crisis get in the way of every job search.”
After spilling coffee on the carpet, Penguin calls in Dick the carpet cleaner from Dick’s Carpet.
“It’s a coffee stain. Can you clean it?” asks Penguin. Dick replies, “I know my stains. That there is no coffee stain.” Penguin responds, “Why would I mislead you? I want you to have the best information available to clean my carpet.”
Dick smugly replies, “Nope. That’s not coffee.”
On opposite ends of email auto-responders, Angry Egg is happy they are ‘working’. However Penguin is frustrated by his inability to communicate.
Angry Egg reads his analytics which show an upward trend in clicks and says, “They interact with my auto-responders! My system is perfect!” On the other end Penguin is frustrated, “What? This makes no sense. Maybe if I ask another way…”
At the dinner table, forks in hand, Penguin declares, “Dinner has been boring…So I spiced it up with a special ingredient.”
Just then Angry Egg breathes fire. Seems his food is a bit too spicy hot. Tip says, “Can we go back to boring?”
Sitting in a room together with the TV on, the TV crowd cheers. “YAY!” yell Angry Egg, Tip and Penguin. “What happened?” asks Penguin. “You cheered. You should know.” says Angry Egg. “Can you believe this?” Angry Egg says to Tip with distaste to the inactive watching of Penguin, to which Tip replies, “What?”
Researching online, Penguin tries to draw a conclusion from several perspectives on the same action. On his screen he sees, “Snowden is NOT a patriot.” and “Snowden nominated for Nobel Peace Prize.” Penguin’s though is, “Is patriotism anti-peace?”
With a new 3D printer, Penguin reads the instructions, “Make anything.” And thinks about 3D printing an igloo.
After being bitten by Bruce the no vegan zombie, Penguin faces a fear; zombie bites not being covered by his health insurance.
Penguin, “Ouch! I hope my insurance covers zombie bites.”
Bruce the no vegan zombie, “Don’t worry. Vegetarians don’t become zombies. Not enough blood thirst. They become vegan.”
“Nooo!!!” screams Penguin.